Happy Diwali!...Count me out...

All the countless reasons that I would take consolation from to celebrate Diwali this year can never overpass the one reason why I don't want to. I am away from home. I am 2 years away from my home, my family, my bro. Though i have all my friends I need and would spend my time anyway, with, on Diwali, I feel shallow.
And i know my folks down there aren't into the festive spirit either.
I dont cry often. And i am not surprised by this realisation. But I am not surprised that my eyes are all moist right now either, beacuse i know that my folks too have their sobs running right now.
I love my family. They love me too.
I complete my family.
And. for a reason not worth this grief(read exams), my family is not complete today. Neither am I.

tujhse zindagi, hai yeh keh rahi, sab to paa liya, ab hai kya kami,
yun to saare sukh hain barse, par door tu hai apne ghar se,
aa laut chal tu ab deewane, jahan koi tujhe apna maane,
awaz de tujhe bulaye, yehi des.

Dad, I see the moment in front of me. You have a running fever, but, still, here you are, sitting outside in the cold wrapped up in shawls, to see me burst crackers.

Mom, there you are. Cooking those ever delicious pooris, withthe mouth watering dessert. And there I am, persuading you to come out and see me, excel in my adventure.

And, bro, there you are. Running all over the place, with your toy gun. I see you passing by me occassionally, with that gleam in your eyes.
And in your eyes I see myself. Proudly presenting a show for all of you, hoping each time I burst a cracker, to see you stand in awe and applaud.

I miss my family.
Happy diwali, all of you.